Tuesday, October 12, 2004

How To Save On Beer

Originally published in July 2004 on several ezines and blogs.

I'm sure you feel the same as I do when you learn that according to the
U.S. National Debt Clock, that as of this morning, the national debt stands at $7,276,744,197,657.03, (over 7 trillion dollars) and that is, GOOD GOD ALMIGHTY WHO'S GONNA PAY FOR ALL THIS?

Obviously YOU will, unless you are say, the President or a member of Congress and have conveniently exempted yourself from the tax legislation you've enacted. Your bill as a citizen however, comes to $24,770.39 and since September 30th, 2003, the national debt began increasing $1.69 billion daily or about 423,558,897 six packs of cheap beer per day.

While you're figuring out where you would store all that beer, you may wonder what the government does when it runs out of borrowed money, scheduled to happen
in October.

See when average Joe Citizen hits the limit on his credit cards he generally auctions off a kidney on Ebay to pay off his debt. But Uncle Sam is not like most people. He will warn Congress to raise the credit limit or else go get real jobs such as greeting people at WalMart. So, after much debate, blaming each other for catering to special interest groups, Congress begrudgingly approves the new debt limit and then resumes serving our country by catering to special interest groups. That's the beauty of this democracy that we have bestowed upon the Iraqi people.

So, if you find the numbers of our national debt shocking, check out
the costs of the Mission Accomplished War in Iraq. According to this site, our war dollars could have hired over two million public school teachers fulfilling President Bush's unfunded No Child Left Behind mandate (Note from Bush: I was only joking!) or provided health insurance for over 52 million uninsured children. Instead, our government has already spent $126 billion American tax dollars to invade a country that posed no imminent threat with an average cost to date of $1600 per citizen. Add this to your 24k bill.

Yet, Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld, assured us that the Iraqi conflict would cost no more than
50 billion dollars. This should serve as a warning to all of us that while under the influence of cheap beer your ability to project costs may be impaired.

And the costs continue to mount.

Running up our national debt.

So, before you buy cheap beer to help you forget all these staggering numbers, keep in mind that the generous Bush Administration awarded their friends at the Halliburton Corporation no-bid contracts giving them an extra $1 billion a month of your tax dollars.

But I must insist that Vice President Dick Cheney, Halliburton's former CEO, has shown no preferential treatment toward his former employer. The $30 million farewell gift they gave him came from a Halliburton office pool (they skipped lunch one day) to express their love and admiration for their departing boss. How touching.

Naturally then you can understand why Cheney got so miffed when Senator Leahy (Vt.) jokingly alleged the VP's continued ties with Halliburton. Displaying the type of diplomacy that has made him so successful Mr. Cheney encouraged Mr. Leahy to perform a certain sexual act you won't see anytime soon on C-Span.

In spite of Mr. Cheney's command of the English language, various audits have revealed that Halliburton bilks the military with everything ranging from outrageous fuel costs to over priced toilet paper. Every time a soldier uses the MX 790-GZ Army Field Toilet, your indebted tax dollars are hard at work. Please don't squeeze the Halliburton!

And Cheney had nothing to do with it. Got that?

Such is the Price of Freedom.

If this has angered you please recall when the Supreme Court handed the presidential election to Bush many hoped he would, if nothing else, stay on vacation and NOT mess up the successful Clinton economy of record employment, a federal surplus, and zero deficits. But, showing the same leadership style that caused him to fail in every business effort prior to becoming president, Bush gave us a war economy resulting in:

The largest deficit in U.S. history,

Record numbers of uninsured children,

A Medicare Reform Bill deceptively sold to Congress,

An unfunded No Child Left Behind mandate,

Tax relief for the top 1% of our wealthiest Americans,

Negative job growth, the likes of which hasn't been seen since President Herbert Hoover's Depression Era days.

Unless you are in the top 1% of the wealthiest Americans such as the Bush and Cheney families, your great grandchildren and their great grandchildren will have to pay for this war through increased taxes. Apparently this is what Bush meant when he said he would cut government spending.

So the impoverished children will have to go without proper health care, and the National Debt will continue to skyrocket, while our tax dollars helps Halliburton support the War on Terror by advancing the Bush Imperial vision.

As for me, tonight I'm buying premium beer with my Visa Card.

©2004, All Rights Reserved,
Audie Gaddis, Please contact author for permission to re-publish.